The Value of “Having Your Head Examined”
Value of Having Your Head Examined: aka Psychotherapy What is the value of having your head examined? Of psychotherapy? The profession of psychotherapy has been around for over 100 years, with less formal versions of personal consultation going back to biblical times. So why is it that the voluntary seeking of psychotherapy can...
Continue Reading→ An Unforgettable Patient: The “Meerkat Boy”
An Unforgettable Patient An unforgettable patient was a child I will refer to as the "Meerkat Boy." He was only 4 ½ years old. His father had mentioned to his own therapist that the child had rarely (if ever) spoken, was reclusive, and was defecating in the corners of rooms. The therapist...
Continue Reading→ Thumb Sucking: Orthodonture or Psychotherapy?
Thumb Sucking Thumb sucking can become a heated issue for parents. "How can I get my child to stop sucking her thumb?" is a common question asked by parents. And there are so many “remedies” on the market to help achieve this goal—bitter nail solutions, thumb wraps, children’s books to coax a child...
Continue Reading→ What a T-Shirt and Ticklish Gorilla Can Teach a Psychotherapist About Building a Life That’s True to the Self
Identity Development I’ve learned much from both my favorite t-shirt and a ticklish gorilla about identity development, self-awareness, and building a life that’s likely to be fulfilling. First, for the t-shirt. My favorite t-shirt has a little label sewn on it that says, “Do what you like, like what you do.” I’ve...
Continue Reading→ Facing Dreaded Projects (How to Make a Mole Hill Out of a Mountain)
Facing Big Projects We’ve all had to face that project that we’ve dreaded. A paper, a speech, preparing an event. Maybe we don’t feel that we have enough background or the skills needed to do the project well or even to do it at all. Or maybe it’s just that it’s so big—like a...
Continue Reading→ New Year’s Resolutions Get a “Bum Rap”!
New Year's Resolutions New Year’s Resolutions get a “bum rap.” They’re often derided as deluded wishful thinking and as rarely successful. But I think they provide us with a wonderful opportunity to reflect and reevaluate, to engage in self-forgiveness and acceptance, and to rekindle hope and commitment to important goals—and, if approached carefully,...
Continue Reading→ Why Can’t We Simply Choose Happiness?
Happiness Can't we simply choose happiness? As a psychologist and psychotherapist, I’ve spent the last 30 years listening to people struggle with anxieties, depression, and loneliness, in search of ways to alleviate unhappiness. And as a professor, I’ve spent as many years researching ways to build resilience—hoping to find ways to prevent...
Continue Reading→ The Importance of Consultation Among Psychotherapists
Consultation for Psychotherapists I tell my graduate students that beyond all the academic exercises of reading, writing, and research, the two most important skills for a competent psychotherapist to master are the capacities for being alone and the tolerance of not knowing. Ironically, even though a psychotherapist spends...
Continue Reading→ A Commentary on the State of Mental Illness in Contemporary Society
Psychiatric Medication Television advertising for psychiatric medications seems to have become as regular as commercials for automobiles, miracle cookware, or cosmetics. We are shown beautiful young men and women enjoying their friends and family, as we are also told that they have major depressions, bipolar moods, insomnia, and other potentially debilitating conditions. Certainly...
Continue Reading→ Are We Over Diagnosing Children With Mental Illnesses?
Over Diagnosing Children I once read an article by Jordan Smoller called, “The Etiology and Treatment of Childhood.”[1] It was a satirical article that described childhood as a mental disorder. He noted that childhood is congenital, is characterized by temporary dwarfism, is marked by emotional instability and immaturity, and that children have...
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